A Big Heart (a follow-up)

I once wrote about a sahaba who had a big heart. The Prophet (saw) thrice stated that this sahaba will be granted heaven, based on his bigheartedness. Big, meaning he was generous; not envious; carried no ill will; and was humble. Attempting to inculcate the same is a difficult battle, especially with our social media, consumer orientation and a complex (dog eat dog) society.

Strategically to achieve bigheartedness we need to excel in :-

A) putting total trust in Allah. Simply put, a huge test, because you will be called on to make self sacrifice. This literally means sacrificing time, money or personal space for others. That sacrifice eventually delivers positive results. The balance sheet actually comes out in the black.

  

B) not having an ego. Most of our actions in life are a function of ego. To counter that, it means thinking one is not superior to anyone. Once you get in that space, this inevitably leads to daily challenges. You have to hug and control yourself and behave humbly. It’s a daily battle, but it becomes easier with time and practice.  

C) not judging others. This is not quite ego. Rather, can be your own filters driving your biases. Let the judgement be at Allah’s door. Want a large unfettered heart, then become non-judgmental. As part of this effort, I totally disconnected from Twitter. That medium tends to be mean, aggressive and battles take place on it all the time. On Twitter, one would struggle to have a good view of mankind. Also, one could stop watching news channels, as they create negativity in themselves and fan the flame (news can be obtained online quite easily!). This judgmental drive will test you. You might fail on a daily basis, but you can at least at the end of the day, leave negativity behind and go cleansed into tomorrow.

D) anger and irritation. While this may also be a function of ego, but predominantly is driven by the frequency, speed and expectation of things nowadays. Stop expecting people to behave well, stop expecting people to deliver responsibly, stop expecting that you will get what you want. Generally, this is the easiest of the lot to achieve. And yes we all make mistakes, so when you lose your temper, go back to the concerned person and apologize. Do not become self righteous. A sincere apology now,  delivers wonders later.

E) handling real hurt and unfairness. There are such pains in life. The best one can do, is review ones own errors in life, apologize to others and use these same evaluations to forgive others who have wronged you in turn. Use First Ramadan every year for an evaluation. It should be a specific occasion and by name and event forgive those who might have dealt you a backhander. It is easier said than done....Through the rest of Ramadan, you should constantly remind yourself of the forgiveness given. By the end of Ramadan, generally, the forgiveness will be real and embedded.

The above is my personal formula to attempt a difficult and elusive gold basket. Needless to say, one is still striving to make it work, but it does lead to a lot of personal satisfaction and some element of clear conscience.


https://sarfarazar.blogspot.com/2017/06/a-big-heart.html

Modern Day Pillars of Ambition

In the old days, power through authority was the biggest pillar of desire and ambition. Kings could change the world. The Pharaoh even had the arrogance to think he could reach for divinity. He was rudely corrected and put in his place, but in the end Kings dominated the world. Power told! Alexander climbed mountains to conquer, Hannibal crossed seas to challenge Rome and Muhammad Fateh dragged ships across land to subjugate. 

Along came Magna Carta in 1216 and the authority of Kings was fenced. You can influence, but you cannot make rules without 'Us' (Us can be various segments of society at different times). The French Revolution in 1789 dealt a fatal and final blow to Kings and the future definition of power changed totally. From a throne, to a series of chairs debating in a hall. In various forms, for the last century this has been a constant. Though there are recent signs that a change is coming soon, in the power of authority, but for the moment 'Power is exercised via cliques and interest groups, while individual authority has receded'.   

Throughout history, money also had its place in individual ambitions. In earlier times, money could be substituted by land, or gold or flocks of livestock. In the Industrial Age it became factories, stocks of goods or commodities, plus paper. Paper which could translate into gold, shares or money. Today it need not be in any physical shape at all. Simply, a digital entry may be worth billions. Facebook, Uber, Google are just such examples. But money always had its limitation. It need not translate into power. Hence, Shylock had to concede to a judge and Qarun (in the Quran) was shown his real place, though he was richer than rich. And hence, China can shut out Facebook.

Nevertheless, ambition for money is a constant drive through history. For some it could be greed and for others it is that elevation of status which is another part of man's ego. We love to be admired and unfortunately this world admires money. So despite its limitation money attracts. I hear someone saying what about comfort and luxury? Comfort and luxury can be achieved with reasonable amounts of money and does not need billions of dollars. That extra bit of money ambition is placed at the door of ego. 

Modernity is shaping out in a different direction. Fame seems to have overtaken money and power. I have no research to justify this statement, but it is what I observe. People are dying to be famous. It can be through stardom, but it can be as big through social media. It need not translate into money, but it definitely translates into power.  

The Twitterati, Facebookers, Instagramers, Whatsappers, Bloggers can move governments and societies today. Remember back to the Arab Spring and see the devastation it caused. And then there was Obama, moving opinions and grabbing the biggest job in the world. It was all done through the power of connectivity and social media. Lately, so much of Brexit and Trumps power and success have come via online connectivity fame. 

This fame and power equation has been further accentuated by the use of 'fake news'. Just a decade ago, it would have been inconceivable that non-existent events could drive power. Today, if I am clever enough and skilled enough, I can create a false event on the net and get it accepted as truth. Based on this acceptance, I can then drive public opinion, my own popularity and eventually acquire the power to influence. Unfortunately, presently there is no defence against such an eventuality. We see that regularly, when totally false and illogical facts are being retweeted a dime a dozen.

We are entering a new age of power. More than anything else, ambition in our children will be connectivity and its trappings of power. The consequences of such a social change is mind boggling. More than ever, the up-bringing and value system of our children is an imperative. With no boundaries to truth, only values deeply set in the mind can keep this world on a fair and decent road.

*from the 1939 movie Gulliver's Travel