Friday, November 17, 2017

Sarfaraz A Rehman: Living in the Now

Sarfaraz A Rehman: Living in the Now: As a child Our time scale was very short. That was the basic reason why we lived in the Now and were happy.  It was incredible how t...

Living in the Now

As a child Our time scale was very short. That was the basic reason why we lived in the Now and were happy.  
It was incredible how the smallest expectation and our happiness would hit the roof. That is because the time span we saw was just upto the expectation. We did not see beyond.

If something bad was about to happen, even then we were like a rubber ball, because we bounced back immediately after the bad event, because we did not look back and so happiness prevailed.  

There is a lesson for us in this. Kids outlook span of a short time, is natural. A fear of the future is deliberately inserted into our children by us humans. Making them slaves of society for the rest of their lives. If we stop, they will continue to be the happy creatures they were at the start. 

The sort of fears we inculcate in our young ones are endless. 
  • a fear of financial security
  • of rejection
  • of loss of face 
  • defeat or failure 
  • loneliness 
  • a lack of love  
  • physical safety
  • And many more specific ones

These kids are born clean happy humans and we distort them. They then end up developing paranoia, ego or insecurities. It mutates them and that mutation becomes the basis of all the troubles of this world. The likes of Borgias, Caligula, Attila, Napoleon, Hitler, Mussolini and many more are just some of the products of their circumstances. The world paid a heavy price for what went on in their houses, schools and early lives. Had their parents and adults been able to see into the future, much could have been prevented. Much! Such a tragedy the world could have been spared.  

Wish there was a way to stop these tragedies in the future. Of leaving these happy bubbling beings just what they were born to be, good happy humans.

* picture is from 123rf.com


Thursday, November 16, 2017

The Laws of Perversity (Never say Never)

imageIts my hypothesis, that there is a trap set at every step during our lives. Its been pre programmed. You just need to find it. And its not that difficult. Just the right mind set and you are in there.
As a kid, I remember my father thinking of buying a Volkswagen Beetle, as a family car. Nothing unusual about that. One in every four cars on the road was a Beetle in those days. This is before the Government of Pakistan decided in its infinite wisdom, that they should tax higher literage cars more than others. So before the Japanese cars took over in Pakistan (and really the world), you could see the Beetles every where. We all went and checked out the Beetle at the showroom and my mother categorically stated that it was a horrible, ugly looking thing, and she would not sit in it. So, alas, no Beetle!
Cut forward 14 years and I was back in Pakistan, studies completed, I had recently joined Unilever, on whose princely salary, all I could afford was an old second hand car, Alhamdulillah. Guess what I ended up buying ? A dilapidated 14 year old Beetle! ( this car had a mind of its own. It would forever stop on Clifton Road at the most inopportune times and caused me constant heartburn). And of course my mother sat often in the same ugly car, for the next 3 years. A soft trap, but nevertheless, one which repeats itself all the time.  
Never say Never!
Just go ahead and state your intentions of not doing something in a categorical fashion, and more than likely, the exact thing you denied, you will end up doing. Now, somewhere there is a Murphy’s Law, which states that anything which could possibly go wrong, well it will go wrong. Similarly, I think there should be a Perversity Law. If you say something will “Never” happen, well sadly it will happen.
In my own personal experience, it has occurred exactly like that. I stated I would not study abroad; I did. Never do Chartered Accountancy; I did. Would not join a commercial organisation; I did. Did not want to be heading an operation; I did. Once I left the commercial world, would never come back; I did. Would never smoke; I did. Will always exercise and have no weight problems; well in the last ten years done little exercise and had the mother of fights to keep the weight in check.
I wonder where this stops and how many others suffer from similar results. Friends I have enquired from, all have a similar story to tell. So is this a worldwide phenomenon? Then the thought occurs, if it is so common, why don’t we humans, stop stating things in a categorical fashion? Or better still, only say “Never” to things you actually want to happen, thus engineering a perverse reaction, all to your benefit. That should lead to the perverse happening., which is what you wanted in the first place… right? If you see what I mean.
So then, my fresh, new Laws of Perversity.
A) if you are sure in your mind you will “Never” do something and you state it out loud for general consumption, you will end up doing it.
B) if you are sure in your mind something will “Never” happen and you state it out loud for general consumption, it will happen.
C) if you are blessed with a high IQ and a devious mind, and believe (A) or (B) are true, and then you state the opposite deliberately, thinking its going to assist you to achieve the same, you are wrong! It will catch you out and it will not happen. It simply reads your intention.
D) Law A and B are therefore the only true laws, based on the confidence of your statement.
Therefore, my conclusion, after a lifetime of experience … Never say Never!
*the picture has been taken from Wylio.com a free picture site.